Spooky?

Would you think I'm spooky if I painted my nails black?
Would you think I'm spooky with "EVIL" tattooed on my back?
Would you think I'm spooky if I had some nipple rings?
Would it be more spooky if I collected dead things?
Would you say I'm spooky if I burned candles often?
Wouldn't it be spooky if I invited you to my coffin?
Would you think I'm spooky if I grew another head?
Or dug up Bela Lugosi just to make sure that he's dead?
Would I be real spooky if I impaled your cat
on a rusty railroad spike, then ironed him til he's flat?
I think I'd be spooky if I chanted in Chinese, filled
your waterbed with jello and molested you with cheese?
Maybe I'd be spookier if I raised giant snails
that would write disgusting death threats to you in their slimy trails.
I think that being spooky means I'd wait til you're asleep,
then I'd eat your toenail clippings and bleet just like a sheep.
Really spooky would be if I strapped you to a door
and made you watch the Backstreet Boys while I roll across the floor,
flinging manhole covers at you til you're bleeding and you're sore,
then I'd hose you down in blue kool-aid, throw fish at you and roar
about the indignity of camel salivation and its effects on the economic
growth of third world countries and why as a result
I have to give you a twinkie enema until you just can't take it ANYMORE!!!!
......would that be spooky?